Dear Future Self,

I see you smiling, sitting so peacefully; you are simply in awe. You’re looking at me, the younger, and more naïve, more determined, more self-righteous self you gave nothing but love and gratitude for me. You watch me cry on my bedroom floor, completely bored and unmotivated by life. You see that I am outraged at how stuck I feel. You see the pain I carry around in my heart.

You see my struggles and see me have my outbursts and cry in fits of rage and you see that I make it through. You see that I’m OK. My pain, my struggles, my issues are not what define me. You see that I make it through this rough patch and you that I come out stronger, smarter and more self-aware than ever bore.

I see you sitting in there, smiling with gratitudes for all the lessons I am in the middle of. The gut-wrenching, painful moments of extreme self-hate, followed by harsh judgment and flurries of condescending words; you are proud to have them be part of your past. You made it through and hold nothing but positive loving thoughts for yourself.

Future Me, your energy and love are infectious. You have a knowing way about that is wise, patient and graceful. You see that everything is always in the right order and that I am going through right now is part of my bigger plan. It’s as if you know that all of this turbulence and stress was divinely put into my life to help me become the person I need to be, the person that you ARE.

Future self, I know that you’re so proud of me for learning these lessons, for rolling up my sleeves and doing the work on myself that’s required; for getting into the trenches of my own life to prepare me for my next chapter. You’re oozing with awareness and you see that I am getting it. Day by day I’m trying, and I am learning to be the person I want to be.

I have chosen to work towards you, and by taking responsibility for my life. You smile because you see that I get it, and that the choices I make today affect you and your daily life in the future. You see that I am showing up and doing the best I can. You see that what may feel like not enough, even a failure, for me this is more than enough, even a failure for me is more than enough in your eyes. You are proud and honored to have been me.

Our experiences make us who we are. I choose to let my dreams and my successes define me; I release my problems and the attachments that keep me identifying with them. I am no longer weighed down by self-loathing thoughts. I choose to be happy.

Future self, you rock, and I are so unbelievably proud I get to become you.

Love forever,

You’re younger, not so together, sad and overweight, yet doing the best she can, and hopeful self …

xoxo, Tezza

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